At Long Last: THE WORST BAD BABY NAMES OF 2004 POLL RESULTS!
Just a note: the results posted here were voted on by BBN readers on Mister Poll (view the poll here). To qualify, the names had to be actual, verified baby names from the year 2004 as taken from newspapers and webnurseries throughout the US and Canada and posted on BAD BABY NAMES. Please read the disclaimer for more information.
Now, on to the results!
CATEGORY ONE: CELEBRITY BAD BABY NAMES!
Those in the spotlight and on the red carpet are not impervious to BAD BABY NAMES..in fact, some seem to revel in the practice. There were many awful choices, but here are our winners!
THIRD PLACE: We have tie! Apple (Gwyneth Paltrow) & Makena'lei (Helen Hunt) (9%)
SECOND PLACE: Wilf (Hermione Norris) (12%)
AND THE WORST CELEBRITY BAD BABY NAME OF 2004, WITH 23% OF THE VOTE, IS...
Whizdom (Jayson Williams)
Not a very "whize" choice there, Jayson.
CATEGORY TWO: CRE8IVE SPELLINGS!
There are parents all over the country who love nothing more than to take a perfectly good baby name...and completely ruin it by misspelling it in every imaginable way. To those parents...this award's for you!
THIRD PLACE: Daykon Mykall Jaycub (10%)
SECOND PLACE: Ccamryn (11%)
AND THE WINNER OF THE WORST CRE8IVE SPELLING OF 2004, WITH 14% OF THE VOTE, IS...
I hope they think qtwice before doing this qagain.
CATEGORY THREE: APOSTROPHE ABUSE!
E'ver notice t'hat name's now'a'day'z are lit'rd wi'th un'nec'ssry apostrophes?
THIRD PLACE: Tied with 5% of the vote: K'le, Ramse's, Da'nyelle & K'iv
SECOND PLACE: Another tie! R'Son & I'jaaz (6%)
AND THE WINNER OF WORST APOSTROPHE ABUSE OF 2004, WITH 9% OF THE VOTE, IS....
Say'It isn't so.
CATEGORY FOUR: REDNECK HALL OF SHAME!
Woo-ee! If yer young'uns are named sumof dese names...you might be a redneck!
THIRD PLACE: Jerleecia (12%)
SECOND PLACE: Erneshia (13%)
AND THE WINNER OF THE REDNECK HALL OF SHAME AWARD FOR 2004 IS...
Destined to inspire jug bands everywhere...Waynelle.
CATEGORY FIVE: PSEUDO-ROYALTY
Not everyone was born with blue blood...some just have names as if they were.
THIRD PLACE: Sultan David (12%)
SECOND PLACE: Pharoah Nicolas (13%)
AND THE WINNER OF THE WORST PSEUDO-ROYALTY CROWN, WITH 16% OF THE VOTE, IS...
Princess Ty Awna Louise
All hail the Princess.
CATEGORY SIX: MOUTHFUL NAMES!
These are names that defy pronounciation. YIKES!
THIRD PLACE: Quawntavious (10%)
SECOND PLACE: Ogheneawore Jesse (22%)
AND THE TONGUE-TWISTER OF 2004, WITH 25% OF THE VOTE, IS...
Holy syllables, Batman!
Now it's time to award the worst of the worst, the bottom of the barrel, the three most awful BAD BABY NAMES of 2004!
In THIRD PLACE:
In SECOND PLACE:
AND HERE IT IS: THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN! THE WORST BAD BABY NAME OF 2004 IS.....
Evidently, this name was not music to your ears!
And there you have it, folks: proof positive that 2004 was a spectacular year for horrendous names! I hope you enjoyed the poll...and that you'll come back next year to vote for the worst names of 2005!
I'd like to thank the following people:
Celebrity Baby Blog, for providing the names for Worst Celebrity Bad Baby Name. It's a great blog, folks: be sure to check it out.
DramaQueen, for giving me bad name after bad name. You're an asset to this blog. A million thanks!
To Mister Poll, for making it easy to set up the poll and for the help towards the blog's mention in the Tampa Tribune article.
To Karla Jackson at the Tampa Tribune, for the great article and great publicity.
And finally, to my son Phoenix, for his tireless help searching the Web for a bevy of bad names.
Until next time...keep sending those BAD BABY NAMES in!