Bad Baby Names!

Welcome to BAD BABY NAMES! All BAD BABY NAMES are actual, verified names from newspapers & online webnurseries from the US & Canada. So enjoy & be glad your parents didn't name you one of these doozies! Remember: all babies are beautiful gifts from God, all created equal...all baby names, however, are NOT.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

BAD BABY NAMES 35: Even John Mellencamp Wanted to Change This Name...

BAD BABY NAMES 35



THE RUNNERS-UP:


Kaden Scharen
Here's a perfect example of people who DIDN'T follow that age-old rule: if it rhymes, save it for another time.


Dejavon Astley
Am I the only one picturing 80's crooner Rick Astley singing, "Don't you know I would move Heaven and Earth to be Dejavon Astley with you!"


Oriah Skye
Sister, perhaps, to Uriah Heap?
(thanks to Zusia)


Surely
Oh, dear. Someone liked Leslie Neilson in "Airplane!" just a tad bit too much.


Jabbarnice
The only known offspring of the dreaded Jabberwocky.


Jozelle
Y'all know it wouldn't be a BBN list without this here REDNECK HALL OF SHAME name! Boy howdy!


A'reyanna
A blantant case of APOSTROPHE ABUSE and CRE8IVE SPELLLING combining their evil powers together to create an unholy BAD BABY NAME alliance.


JonLogan
I've heard of parents compromising when they can't decide on a name, but usually, one of the names in question becomes a MIDDLE name. As in, seperate from the first name.


Charleston
Won't you Charleston with me?


Yvontaysia
What a MOUTHFUL!





SECOND RUNNER-UP:


Flame
This kid is either going to be a biker, a demolition expert, a female impersonator or someone who spends their "down time" at Star Trek conventions. You just know it.



FIRST RUNNER-UP:


Wisdom
Sorry...but I've got to question the Wisdom of this.




AND THE WINNER OF BAD BABY NAMES 35 IS.....



Cougar


This brings to mind a good rule of thumb: don't take naming advice from John Mellencamp's agent.




Feel free to leave comments....

11 Comments:

  • At 5:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I agree. Those are Some pretty scary names. Here are a few more for you: Galaxy Athena
    Ariana Charlestine Reese-Ann
    Bowan
    Jaxxonn Brick
    Rainey Daye
    Joiuss Starr-Miekka
    Chrissias Niccola
    Sylvia Natasha Suette
    Satchel Hogan
    Rock Stone
    and last , but certainly not least , Savannah Cerissa Viola Zoe-Kriss. These names come from some other sites and local papers. Shamefully , some are in my family.
    Oh well. Everyone has a reason for giving their little ones these sometimes not-so-little names. I'm just glad my mother stuck with something simple!

    Angela from IL

     
  • At 12:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    My son's name is Cougar. We love it. Our friends love it. We understand there are people who don't like it but Cougar's friends are named Stone, Zane, Dante, Lincoln and other non-traditional names so it doesn't feel so odd out here. My wife and I agree that such a unique name might limit him from being "President Cougar" or even "Dr. Cougar" but we also think the culture of names is rapidly evolving and things might feel very different in 30 years. Regardless, choosing a name for your baby is difficult because whether it's John or Otis or D'Brickashaw you're making some assumptions about his/her identity before they have any say in the matter. In the end, we can't imagine having a son named anything else. He IS Cougar.

     
  • At 8:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Haha. Excellent. Some of the comments on this batch made me laugh out loud.

     
  • At 4:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    One of my kids classmates is Forreste, her brother is River and her little sister is Bindi which here in Australia is an annoying prickle you find in the grass. Love this site...guaranteed to make you chickle.
    Wendy (yes...plain old Wendy)

     
  • At 7:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think I may have found two new winners for next year. These kids were born just this month (June):

    Flashay
    and
    Hal'Javious

    Also in the last week, I've come across:

    Khaliq
    Mazeo
    Calix

     
  • At 6:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You are such a moron and obviously uneducated to say what are "ugly names".Whats your name huh?Something like a common Sarah or something !? People could just as simply say that your name is a piece of crap whatever it is.That is so unbelievably offensive .Names come from around the world and are influenced by culture and for you to say something like the name JOZELLE is a REDNECK NAME?!!!! You've lost your cotton pikin' mind you obviously must be a REDNECK.JOZELLE is European for your information!I am not a REDNECK LET ALONE WHITE and trust me Im a whole lot smarter than you!!!!I get straight A's and Im in advace classes sothere you go!You must not have been loved as a child to do something to stupid and actually sit down and find the time to bash people's names!It's a beautiful name that if you got the chance to actually sit down and look at it and how it's pronounced you stupid Ameriucan you would see that it's (Joe-zelle like Gazelle ).My friends like my name and thats all that matters anywayes and I dont have time to waste on such narrow minded type of a "person".I use the term ever so loosly!While your still middle class I'll be making millions of dollars as my career as a Journalist and seeing the world and learning about it's cultures.So I stand up for all those peope's names you put on that "List" of yours and tell you to go get a real life.Put that in your pipe and some it!!!!

     
  • At 12:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Okay, can I just say something about the anonymous person above me?
    Obviously you didn't understand that this was for humor. It was never written to offend anyone, so get over it. Besides for you to go and say you don't have enough time to waste on a person who finds certain names hilarious, but still leave a nasty little rant on the page is almost contradicting this whole "time" issue.
    Huh, so you're in advanced classes and get straight A's? So judging by that I'd assume you're just a teenager in high school who obviously has a lot of growing up to do, especially if you think "gazelle", like the animal, is pronounced the same way as your name. Also, throwing a fit on a random site where no one really cares that you exist isn't exactly what I call "mature" either. Automatically assuming that someone's parents' didn't love them just because they find something funny is by far the most overused thing I hear from teenagers today mainly because they're too wrapped up in themselves to even come up with a decent insult, and for that matter, a reasonable argument. So basically you just threw a hissy fit because someone found your name comical. Ask yourself, who's the immature one?
    As for you "redneck" argument, anyone who uses "cotton pickin" certainly needs to be accused of being a redneck. For you to say you're smarter than the author of this post is hard for me to believe because you can't even manage to put an apostrophe between the I and the m in "I'm". Plus to talk big about how you'll have millions of dollars from the career you don't have yet is pretty rash if you ask me. Looking at all the grammatical and spelling errors through this comment makes it hard for me to believe you truly are an advanced student. Please next time, when you mention the "smart student" thing, defend it with proof starting with your writing skills. Last but not least, when executing a worthy last-minute comeback make sure you write it correctly because I have no idea how to stick something in pipe and "some" it. Please, explain this procedure to me. Apparently only those in advanced classes have the knowledge to do this task.

    (for all of those who came to this site for a good laugh, I apologize. The mature thing to do was to leave it alone, and for that I am sorry. It was just far too tempting for me to avoid. Enjoy the names!)

    Oh and none of these names beat Pilot Inspektor
    (correct spelling of the name, too)

     
  • At 8:24 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Cougar is a strong powerful name for a boy. You are way off if you say that is a bad name. Nobody forgets that name, it's completely alpha-male. There's no holding back anyone named Cougar from what they want to accomplish.

     
  • At 9:41 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    My son's name is Cougar.
    We love his name and so does he.
    Switch the g and r with an e at the end and he is courage.
    It is a strong powerful name.
    He is brave, strong and loving.

     
  • At 4:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    My son is also Cougar. He loves his name and wears it well. He is 11.I also have a son named River.

     
  • At 7:15 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

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